i'm ready

after months, over 262,800 minutes,
of lashing and burning between the eyes of my own anger,
submitting to a searing headache,
bowing to the arms of a loveless master,
buckling under the pressure--

arms swinging from side to side,
hitting everything within the 5' 8" radius,
bruised but breaking everyone else,
everything hurting,
everything tearing me from side to side
from the inside out.

she thinks it's still there
the headache.

she thinks I can't help,
but I'm ready.

I've been fighting,
and I'm ready,
my arms are ready to hug instead of bruise,
to heal not blacken.
I'm ready to be there,
I'm ready to be patient.
I'm ready to open my heart,
I'm ready to let things go.
I'm ready to use the tools I've learned to protect myself,
and protect her, protect everyone.
I'm ready to become,
to inspire,
to connect,
I'm ready to be me.