Some different writing

remember that time when i was infinitely happy and used cliches.and remember when you did too.
I used to play with your mind like you used to play with your baby brother.
I
          was
                          so
                                                                                    ....superior
and reluctant to admit it and in charge.
I think that really
I think that maybe
I think that even if
I think that I know
I think I'm sorry
I think that
I think
I
I
I
I
.
Okay I don't think I act I'm impulsive I'm emotional I'm unstable
O.K. I ruined it but I think I ruined it a long time ago.
Oh Kay maybe this is eccentric and weird and awful but maybe this is how I'm feeling and maybe I'm feeling unbroken and broken at the same time and somehow the cracks make me whole.
Okay maybe I'm stuck in the memories but O.K. I think its repression so just ignore it and let it be.

I have a wild imagination and I'm not good at hiding it.
Maybe I have schizophrenia because I'm carelessly wandering into alternate realities where you are always,
and he is always, and we are always.
Always.

I'm too afraid, I'm too scared, I'm too frightened, I'm too excited.
Excited?

Cheater cheater
wears a wife beater
pumpkin eater
Peter

That rhymed but you never cheated on me because its impossible to cheat on a test that you never prepared for or maybe for a test that you never even took?

maybe the reason why i am stuck is because i never tried to get out.maybe now i am ready to catch trout.
Trout?

Seriously though

I moved on a long time ago but it took my head a long time to catch up to my heart.
I have low blood circulation.

Just going with the motions.

Comprehensively, I've had an overall average day.
You know, I'm just like the coolest person in school so  naturally I have 400 friends and everybody loves me.
Actually not really. Mostly I just went to school and learned some knowledge. But is being cool important? I don't know. I guess if you wanna have really Great Great high school experience, you should really get updated on how to be cool. When this boy in my English class gave a speech on how to be cool at Lone Peak, it was pretty informative and really helped me out a lot. But he didn't really address the girls. So let me just tell you, my friends, ten ways how to be the prettiest, most popular girls at school.
1. Dye your hair.
            Preferably a nice shade of platinum blonde would do (with brown roots or underneath), but mostly any color will get you into a popular group, just as long as it isn't your natural hair color.
2. Wear super cute clothes.
            Most likely this will include short, tight floral or indian print skirts. Make sure that you buy all of your clothes at Forever 21 or at H&M so you won't be embarrassed when you tell somebody where you got them. You'll need about 300 fake vintage necklaces, and multiple rings on your fingers at once. Don't forget to wear 5-inch heels with all of your jeans.
3. Go to all the dances and post 100 pictures on Facebook.
            If you don't get asked, you're social history. And if you do get asked, put all the pictures on the internet. And make sure they are SOUPS professional and make sure you look gorgeous in all of them.
4. Have a Twitter
            I don't understand this, but apparently its cool.
5. Use the Instagram or Pixlr-matic app on your i-Phone for every picture you take.
            Even though everyone knows that all your pictures are photoshopped, you can always pretend you still don't live in the century of incredibly clear photography and software, right?
6. Have an iPhone
            How would you Tweet every 5 seconds or post photos on instagram without it, right?
7. Don't play a sport.
            Sports are for boys. The only sport you are allowed to be into are cheerleading and dance, otherwise, just go to the game if you are cheering, okay? (and you better be at all the games, otherwise, who knows what will happen to you.)
8. Flirt it up with the jocks.
             These boys may or may not be smart, have good morals, or have any common sense at all, but make sure that you are the girl of their dreams. Never be smarter than them, and make sure you don't go to half your classes because you are talking or making out with them.
9. Don't eat lunch.
              Ohmyheck you could TOTES get SO fat if you ever did that. Maybe sneak in a bag of carrots in third period, but you better not have anybody in that class who you know.
10. Be on a Jr. Jazz team full of your besties.
               Even if you don't play basketball (oh wait. You aren't allowed to, so you better not know how to), get all of your cheerleader or dance friends to create a team with you. Name yourself something ridiculous like "the basketball babes" or something very gangsta' like "Ballers." Make sure you wear preppy sweat bands and run around like a little mouse the whole time. Have a fan base of all your jock friends and make sure they come to every game. When you shoot, make sure you let out a cute little scream and just chuck it.

Now that you know how to be a cool girl at Lone Peak, I'm looking forward to seeing your transformation on monday when we get back.

Hi.

Hi, I'm Kalli.
I just want to welcome you all out here today, I really appreciate you coming.
I'm here because, well I'm addicted to the internet.
I'm here because I think it will solve all my problems.
But in reality, it only creates them.
Its true what people say--
I have nothing better to do. (unless you count homework as better)

So, how's life?
How have you been?
Haven't seen you in years!
I'm...great.
The truth is that I'm having some [serious] stress issues.
I've been making a lot of wishes at 11:11.

I think its high school. When you ask somebody, anybody, about high school, they'll most likely say either that it was the best time of their life, or the absolute worst. It doesn't take a miracle to figure out who hated it and who loved it.

Those more fortunate folks who are wishing they were in high school again were most likely the most popular. The prettiest. The ones who got asked to all the dances. The cheerleaders, the football stars. Probably [Chase Hansen] in 20 years.

The worst--lets be honest. Those kids who struggle to make friends. The awkward ones. The ones who don't have any athletic ability. The people who you don't even know their name and you have gone to school with them all your life. These kids are working their butts off to become doctors, and in 20 years, they'll be a lot happier than they are now.

Where do I fit in? Who knows. My high school life is mediocre. I'm not the most popular girl ever, but I can't say I'm the nerdiest either. Sure, I had perfect attendance this term. No big deal. I didn't win the iPod.

To be honest, I like myself. I think I'm pretty. The boys may not, but as long as I have my hair and my smile, I'll get along fine. I am usually [very] upset the days I don't get asked to dances {have I mentioned I haven't been asked to one yet?}, but it doesn't really matter in the long run. I'm taking AP classes for no reason, falling in love with boys who I won't remember in a couple years [Chase Hansen], and trying out for sports.
But, school just drives me bonkers anyway.

I can't say I've slept alone in weeks.
Because every night, I'm thinking.
Thinking about homework.
Thinking about boys. [not Chase Hansen]
Thinking about my future.
I can't leave myself alone.
I worry over clothes. 
I stress over past conversations.
I fret about Christmas presents.
I create alternate realities.
I become my dreams.
{which is scary considering the dreams I have}

I'm just a {super ordinary} girl with nothing but a red coat from DI, indian boots, and auburn hair.

{super ordinary}--(soo-per awr-dn-er-ee):
                 *wonderful, beautiful, unique, eccentric, half-hipster, smart, happy, imaginative, loquacious, crazy, insane, self-conscious, musical, extraordinary.